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I'm a child of God.

I mentioned in a previous post that I am a Christian, a woman of faith. It’s a big piece of who I am as a human. Sometimes when people hear that, they’re like, oh great, a bible thumper. She’s probably not fun, she’s probably prude and serious. She’s probably super judgemental. But really, I’m like a lot of people that I know. I’m a mess. A hilarious mess, but a mess all the same. I fall off the path of faith sometimes but I always come wandering back. I think most people get lost or distracted in the ways of the world, how do you not? The world is what we can see, hear, and feel all around us daily. Social media distracts us. Television and even our peers can cause us to step off the path unintentionally. And you know what? It’s ok.

I pray daily. And in times of trouble, I pray obsessively over things that have gone awry. You know the saying “don’t worry, pray”? I do both. I can’t seem to help myself. I fully trust that God will always carry me, but He also made me anxious. And He knows it. I pray with a grateful heart and say “Thank you for the blessings you’ve given me and the ones you’re still going to give (faith) even though I have no idea how this will work out" (anxiety). I am a child of God, and a human being.

Throughout my journey of faith I have been hurt, jealous, angry, sad, happy, overwhelmed, amazed, and down right confused. But you know what? I wouldn’t change a single moment of it. Those experiences are the exact ingredients that make me who I am today. They are the reason I have so much to write about and share with you.

Insert smooth transition here. A professional writer would be able to do that seamlessly, but you’re stuck with me instead. Do you pray in the car? I do. Do you sing along with the radio? Yep, always. Maybe it’s podcasts for you. I love them when I drive more than thirty minutes one way. Some days I play a little Snoop Dog and Dr Dre, sometimes it's Janis Joplin and Miranda Lambert, and then there are the other days with Hillsong Worship and Chris Tomlin for worshiping my heavenly Dad. Whichever kind of day, it’s a “top of my lungs” concert. But there is one song that gets me every time. If it’s the only christian song you ever listen to, it might be the only one you need. The lyrics of the song “Who you say I am” by Hillsong Worship center me every time I need it.

Who the Son sets free

Oh, is free indeed

I’m a child of God

Yes, I am

In my Father’s house

There’s a place for me

I’m a child of God

Yes, I am

If these words strike a chord, bring you an instant of peace, or peak your curiosity even for a split second, you should listen to the song. Even if they don’t, give it a listen anyway. It’s only a few minutes out of your day. Here’s the youtube link

I’m listening to it as I write this.


What does it mean to be a Child of God? I’m not a pastor, well not really. I got ordained online, but it didn’t require much, so I don’t feel like it counts. (I’ll tell you later why I got ordained, that’s a good story). To me, being a Child of God is not something I did, nor something I deserve. I do accept Jesus as my savior and the son of God. I do believe that he was here and walked the earth and died for the sins of those before Him, present to Him and all who came after Him. I can’t explain how I know that Jesus exists, but I do know, without any doubt in my mind. I have felt His presence a number of times throughout my life and have heard Him speak to me. The only problem is, it’s quiet and not always clear, and most of the time it has been in the early morning when I’m not completely coherent. It’s a fun game we like to play lol. “Did I hear that or was I dreaming? No, I heard that.” Sometimes I hear only one single word, which makes no sense and then I wonder for days what it means. Once in a while the meaning is revealed and it’s such a peaceful time and moment of impact all at once.

Reading a passage of scripture and then journaling about it really helps me connect. Sometimes that connection is only for moments and other times it carries me for days. Either way, time with God fills my cup. Sometimes I feel Him with me in church, or in my home office (I have a little prayer area), but mostly it’s when I’m walking trails in the metroparks. I’m more connected to Jesus when I’m submersed in nature, even in the winter (as long as the wind doesn’t make me cry). I’ve had strangers come up to me and ask to pray over me in the most random places. It’s like I’m a magnet for that. And I have prayed over some others myself and continually ask God to use me as He sees fit. It’s the least I can do for all of the blessings He has given me. I am a child of God.

Switching gears though, I get so fed up with the arguing between “branches of the church”. Well you’re wrong because you don’t believe “this”- no you’re wrong because it says “THIS”. Read your bible if you want to. It has been interpreted millions of times over hundreds of years. It contradicts itself in parts from the Old Testament to the New Testament. People cherry pick the parts that apply to them, and then accuse others of “walking in sin” for choices they make. Wars have been fought over whose version is correct. I invited someone I was dating (years ago) to karaoke one time, and he said “I don’t think this will work if you hang out in places like that. I’m trying to be a witness to God.” Which I think is so naive because Jesus didn’t find his apostles in church. He found them on the street in the midst of their struggles. You know where the easiest place to find someone struggling is? On a freakin’ barstool. I know, I was a bartender for a few years. You can always bring some church up-in- there. Hit ‘em with Chain Breaker or Reckless Love and you just never know. Sunday might be for church, but someone should start “Saving Souls Saturday nights”... I’m just sayin’. That same “witness” I mentioned, wouldn’t be caught dead at a bar that hosted karaoke, but had no problem sleeping around. Like I said, cherry picked. Judgemental of me, I know… I told you, I still struggle sometimes.

Love God, be passionate and teach others with love. Judging others sure isn’t the way to fill up a congregation. If you were walking through a parking lot with Jesus, what do you think he would say to a stranger? Do you ever say anything to strangers? How about in traffic? I know, I know, that’s not really a fair one, we all struggle with some form of road rage. But judgment is God’s job, and only His job, yet here we all are sitting on our couches or at the dinner table judging whoever, whenever. I’m still a child of God.

I had a conversation one time, with another parent who grew up “in church”. I did too, but struggled to find the right church for me before finally landing at my home church. The conversation went something like this. “If one of my kids came out as gay, I would disown them. It’s a sin.” I’ve heard that said before, many times. Most people don’t mean it, some people do. What I remember about this conversation is that it hurt to hear it. Maybe because it was someone so close to me that said it, and the “kids” were real to me and not some hypothetical kids. My response, in that moment, was “I wouldn’t. I couldn’t. I think being gay would make their life much harder, and life is hard already, but I would never disown my child because of it. I want them to be who God put them on this earth to be.” I remember my daughter saying to me “Mom, you don’t like gay people, do you?” and that actually stunned me. It stunned me because it’s just not true. I went to art school for goodness sake. If there was ever a large LGBTQ population, it’s at art schools. I don’t care what anyone’s sexual preference is, as long as it’s not little kids. That’s a different conversation altogether. What I don’t like is forced tolerance. What I don’t like is constantly being told that I have to accept this or that. Do you know what I do like? Love. I like when people find their mate. I like people being treated well. I like people being true to who they are because it speaks to their soul. There is so much more to someone than their sexuality. I love being in the presence of love. I guarantee that any one of you reading this who wants to start arguing on this point, has at least one personal issue, or fear, or problem, or sin that you have avoided or ignored, or completely swept away as if you have no growing to do. So instead of judging someone else and getting all riled up, work on yourself. Many times judgment comes from insecurity or lack of knowledge. Educate yourself, be secure in who you are and what you struggle with before judging someone else. I am a child of God, I am not God. Judgment is not my job, and it isn’t yours either. Do you know what is? Love. Love is my job. Love is your job too.

Job description: Yet Jesus also said, “I give you a new commandment: love one another. Just as I have loved you, you must also love one another” (John 13:34).

To answer the question, why did I get ordained? One of my closest girlfriends and her husband got divorced a few years ago. It was so sad and unfortunate, but I knew that they loved each other. Neither one of them were what many call “believers” so they didn’t pray for reconciliation or for anything else really. But I did. I prayed on their behalf for God to cover them even if they never reach out. I spent so much time with her that I could see that them being apart wasn’t right, even though she tried to justify it every way she could think of. I prayed for them. I prayed for their marriage many times and for reconciliation. I had a whole prayer wall that consisted of post it notes covering the side of my tall filing cabinet. Every person that asked for or needed prayer had a post-it note. Even people who never asked had a post-it note. Many of my friends and family have no idea that they were on my prayer wall, or in my journal. After more than a year after the divorce, (I’m not sure how much more) she told me that they had seen each other a few times and were talking about reconciliation. After they officially reconciled, I sent her my prayer journal entries about her and her husband. She didn’t know I was praying on their behalf, but that’s how God works sometimes. It doesn’t have anything to do with me. I felt led to cover them, when they couldn’t or wouldn’t. I could see what they couldn’t because God gave me discernment and He reconciled them. She cried and asked me to be the one to remarry them, so I got ordained and married them again.

Do they still struggle? Sure. Everyone does. But I still pray for them. And I love them, even if they forget to love each other.

This is what I believe it means to be a child of God. So I love, and I pray. I fail, and I pray some more. And I always trust God. In my Father’s house, there’s a place for me. I’m a child of God. Yes, I am

May love and comfort surround you,


If you love the image of Jesus hugging the woman, I found it on amazon. Here’s the affiliate link:


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